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Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Too much too fast

Yesterday I began a series of three classes to teach me more about DEALING with diabetes. I'm listening for 3 hours and learning a lot. oh so tired brain seems to only be able to handle so much and them I just stop. I don't get confused. I just stop.
I'm glad there is a notebook that goes with the class or I'd be completely overwhelmed.

OK. I'm going to have to exercise. From what the teacher(an RN)said, the best way to bring down blood sugar is to exercise and to lose weight. I now have a problem to overcome. I hate hate hate to exercise. But I will.

I have felt a little sorry for myself. No, actually, I have felt a lot sorry for myself. Hence a few new outfits. Pictures to follow.

Saturday, June 23, 2012

There's more to life

I've been trying to come to grips with being diabetic. I know millions of other folks have the disease and deal with it well. I'm not sure how long it's supposed to take to develop any sort of comfort with my life changes. I have been lucky in my life to have had no real long term health problems.

I find myself being exhausted emotionally. I'm not able to focus sometimes and I have been depressed some of the time. I can't confide in my partner because he doesn't really have any understanding and doesn't want to hear it. According to him life is supposed to continue as usual and act as if nothing has changed. Well, I have tried and so far, not so good. He is working in a very hot job and has had to help a lot at home. He is angry about that. I suppose I don't blame him for that but I am feeling as if I have been blasted with live ammo. Not only is he angry with me, so is my body.

Next week I'll take some classes about being diabetic. I hope they help me understand and put things into persective.

I had lost many of my favorite blogs and am now trying to get them back. During the long period that I wasn't writing in this blog I was still reading and enjoying the blogs I was following. It was a blow to lose them.

I am also noticing a few things fashion wise.
     We may love certain styles but don't wear them.
     Long, long hair, parted in the middle seems to be the thing. I think it's boring.
     I am stunned by the number of emaciated models and regular girls I see.
     I am glad I'm too old to wear 6 inch heels. They look uncomfortable.
     There are still a lot of people using tanning beds and sunbathing. Dangerous.
     I love Pinterest. Pinned fashion seems to be just skinny jeans, high heels, and a few
           added accessories in different colors. I think I need to ignore that stuff. Too old.

I am gearing up to get a better handle on my life. Partly because of the diabetes, I had gained a lot of more weight in a short time. I now watch what I eat. Big time. But because of the disease, losing is much harder now. I still want to do it. I find that no matter what I wear, I don't feel stylish at this weight. I used to feel a bit sexy when I dressed up. You know- cleavage, big earrings, nice make-up. I now feel totally unsexy. I am almost 67 but inside I don't feel that old. I am going to try to "bring sexy back". I need it. And I'm going to try to share it in some pics on the blog. Maybe part of my getting my life on track will be to add some things back into it that I liked. I am, after all, not just a disease.